The Feast of Saint Nicholas officially takes place in Catholic communities and homes on December 6th. This year he arrived a little late at our house. It was well worth the wait, as he brought much more than the standard fruit and nuts. On December 30th, by the grace of God, our child was born.
Yes... we have our baby!
Over the next few days, I will post all the events that have transpired. Pictures will also be forthcoming!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
Holiday Vacation
Monday, November 9, 2009
Marching on...
Our adoption agency continues to encourage us through emails and conversations. They use phrases like, “It will happen soon” or “It will happen for you.” Regardless of these broad statements, we are disappointed and frustrated. Yes, once again we were not chosen.
We continue to repeat the words, “keep the faith.” This is a constant mantra in our life. We hear these 3 words in our heads and from everyone around us. Despite these positive thoughts, it feels as if we are perpetually setting ourselves up for rejection and disappointment.
When is enough really enough? When do we loose the word when and replace it with if? These are questions that perplex us. As for today, we are putting one foot in front of another. We are continuing on this path marching to the beat of our own drum.
At present, we find great solace in the following statement. "We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world", Helen Keller (1880 - 1968).
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Racing for a match!
The race has begun once again! We feel as if the starting line gun shot has gone off and we are racing for a win. Our adoption agency’s Director informed us, on Friday, that our profile is once again being shared with a potential birthmother. We hope that we make it to the finish line as the winners of this match.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Resetting our clock!
We are giving ourselves a new outlook with a revised calendar. Reflecting back, it took 7 months for our first unsuccessful match to occur. At this point, we are resetting our clock/calendar and starting over. This time around, the clock started officially ticking in August. That’s when everything got back on track and our adoption agency began showing our profile again. If you are counting… that puts us a little shy of waiting 3 months.
We have great faith in our adoption agency and all the staff working on our behalf. We spoke with our agency last week. They have 13 unmatched birthmothers living in agency housing. Hopefully, we will have a successful match soon.
We have great faith in our adoption agency and all the staff working on our behalf. We spoke with our agency last week. They have 13 unmatched birthmothers living in agency housing. Hopefully, we will have a successful match soon.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Life Lesson
Tina Berry’s voice resonates from the television, "Look at this little Hispanic beauty… she's gorgeous with her olive skin and big amber eyes! If you're joining us for the first time it's our Baby Hour.” Tina quietly whispers, cuddles the baby girl and states, “You could name her Josephina or whatever your heart desires.” Barbara Marville’s voice interjects from beyond the camera, “Next up we have Caucasian boys with blonde hair and blue eyes.” The crescendo of Barbara's voice increases as she says, “This is the perfect addition for the all American family! Remember they're drug free newborns… quantities are limited.”
Looking back… I could have been watching a surreal scene from the Home Shopping Network. In hindsight, it was more like ordering a child or sofa online from Pottery Barn. Check all boxes that apply: African American, down stuffed, Biracial, foam wrapped, Native American, tufted back, drug free, French mahogany finish, male, female, and the list goes on. Looking back, I am amazed by the process and our thought process.
In the beginning… we thought intently about our life, surrounding community, friends and family. Thoughtfully considering, how we could support our future child’s mind, body and spirit. Books were read, doctors were consulted, demographics reviewed. In the end … data gathered swayed us to select a narrow group of children that would meet our family’s needs.
Life experiences are the true catalyst of change. They make you look at yourself and everyone around you in a different way. These experiences make it possible to see the world clearer and from a higher place you have never been before.
During our first match/failed placement it was realized that our child’s ethnicity could not be clearly defined until birth. It was also known that no prenatal care had been provided until the 8th month of pregnancy. As we became more acquainted with our birthmother; it was evident that her social and medical history was incomplete and inaccurate. We slowly learned that we would never know the facts from the past or the mental and health liabilities that lie ahead. Revelations unfolded and we accepted all possibilities and complications. Each time taking a huge step and letting faith guide us on our path.
Then she was born! She could have been green with purple stripes. It did not matter as she was ours. She could have had a cleft lip or club feet. We would not have cared because she was ours. We counted ten little finger and ten tiny toes. We had never looked at something so beautiful or with such pride. She was perfect and she was ours.
We all know how this story ended, but she was ours for a short while. She taught us a great deal during our brief time together. We learned how to love unconditionally and love without limits. When we gazed into her eyes all our fears disappeared. Our love for her transcended all concerns. We focused only on the present and knew we could handle whatever the future presented. She was ours and will always remain as our child in our hearts.
Our loss and failed placement taught us many things. We now know picking and choosing is a burdensome task. We understand that this is not our role. Our capacity to parent is not built around matching criteria but our ability to unconditionally love. At this point, all our boxes are checked and our only desire is to parent. We will be happy and content to receive whatever child God provides. What a great life lesson we have learned. Through the eyes of a child our world was forever changed.
Looking back… I could have been watching a surreal scene from the Home Shopping Network. In hindsight, it was more like ordering a child or sofa online from Pottery Barn. Check all boxes that apply: African American, down stuffed, Biracial, foam wrapped, Native American, tufted back, drug free, French mahogany finish, male, female, and the list goes on. Looking back, I am amazed by the process and our thought process.
In the beginning… we thought intently about our life, surrounding community, friends and family. Thoughtfully considering, how we could support our future child’s mind, body and spirit. Books were read, doctors were consulted, demographics reviewed. In the end … data gathered swayed us to select a narrow group of children that would meet our family’s needs.
Life experiences are the true catalyst of change. They make you look at yourself and everyone around you in a different way. These experiences make it possible to see the world clearer and from a higher place you have never been before.
During our first match/failed placement it was realized that our child’s ethnicity could not be clearly defined until birth. It was also known that no prenatal care had been provided until the 8th month of pregnancy. As we became more acquainted with our birthmother; it was evident that her social and medical history was incomplete and inaccurate. We slowly learned that we would never know the facts from the past or the mental and health liabilities that lie ahead. Revelations unfolded and we accepted all possibilities and complications. Each time taking a huge step and letting faith guide us on our path.
Then she was born! She could have been green with purple stripes. It did not matter as she was ours. She could have had a cleft lip or club feet. We would not have cared because she was ours. We counted ten little finger and ten tiny toes. We had never looked at something so beautiful or with such pride. She was perfect and she was ours.
We all know how this story ended, but she was ours for a short while. She taught us a great deal during our brief time together. We learned how to love unconditionally and love without limits. When we gazed into her eyes all our fears disappeared. Our love for her transcended all concerns. We focused only on the present and knew we could handle whatever the future presented. She was ours and will always remain as our child in our hearts.
Our loss and failed placement taught us many things. We now know picking and choosing is a burdensome task. We understand that this is not our role. Our capacity to parent is not built around matching criteria but our ability to unconditionally love. At this point, all our boxes are checked and our only desire is to parent. We will be happy and content to receive whatever child God provides. What a great life lesson we have learned. Through the eyes of a child our world was forever changed.
Friday, October 9, 2009
The pages continue to turn...
October is a milestone month for us as we celebrate one year of waiting. It’s kind of a melancholy anniversary of sorts. We have officially spent the last 365 days on the sidelines watching the days unfold at a snail's pace. We feel like children waiting for Santa in July. This is the longest never ending wait!
A lot has happened but we have nothing to show for all our efforts. In spite of our two failed matches; we continue to go forward. We are sad for all that has occurred, but grateful for the life lessons we have learned along the way.
This journey has forced us to look at ourselves and our world in a completely new way. It has been a hard process but very worthwhile. We would never have come to our current realizations without our failures and lessons in grief.
Our adoption agency continues to work on our behalf. They continue to show our profile and search for a match. The agency is doing everything within their power to help us achieve our family goals.
Currently, 12 unmatched birthmothers are working with our adoption agency. We hope that one of these women will choose to work with us in the coming months.
Our child will come to us in time. It is hard to acknowledge, but we are not in control of the situation or outcome. We must continue to have faith in the process and faith in a divine plan.
It takes a great passion and much resilience to proceed on this path. We remind ourselves of Chuck Sigars words, “Calendars are for careful people, not for passionate ones.” Our passion is what keeps us going and time limits can not be imposed.
A lot has happened but we have nothing to show for all our efforts. In spite of our two failed matches; we continue to go forward. We are sad for all that has occurred, but grateful for the life lessons we have learned along the way.
This journey has forced us to look at ourselves and our world in a completely new way. It has been a hard process but very worthwhile. We would never have come to our current realizations without our failures and lessons in grief.
Our adoption agency continues to work on our behalf. They continue to show our profile and search for a match. The agency is doing everything within their power to help us achieve our family goals.
Currently, 12 unmatched birthmothers are working with our adoption agency. We hope that one of these women will choose to work with us in the coming months.
Our child will come to us in time. It is hard to acknowledge, but we are not in control of the situation or outcome. We must continue to have faith in the process and faith in a divine plan.
It takes a great passion and much resilience to proceed on this path. We remind ourselves of Chuck Sigars words, “Calendars are for careful people, not for passionate ones.” Our passion is what keeps us going and time limits can not be imposed.
Labels:
Adoption Agency,
Matching,
Personal Journal,
Year in Review
Friday, September 11, 2009
Hold on tight!!
I am on a never ending roller coaster ride. My stomach turns and twists, my adrenalin skyrockets while ten different emotions overwhelm me at the same time. I am not a fan of roller coasters! Some days I would like to stop, get off and never look back. I would like to stop but I can’t.
I feel this great passion and need to continue on with our adoption plan. Tears have been shed and frustrations have been expressed throughout the process. I pray these feeling subside but without them I would not continue. The reality is… without these emotions I would stop and turn my back on the entire adoption process. My emotions keep this passion burning in me and make me realize that I need to continue regardless of how much it hurts. No words of wisdom will make me feel better and no prayers will bring me peace. The only way I will find serenity is to complete the adoption.
I long for the life I had before adoption applications, home studies and birthmothers. A life that was fun, spontaneous and full of joy. To my astonishment that past life does not exist anymore. Even if I could go back, that life would be impossible to find. My destiny lays head of me with tears, emotions and the hope of adopting a child.
Our profile was shown twice and rejected twice last week. Jose and I will continue to push ahead until we find our match. We must find our match! That is the only way the tears, fears and emotions will vanish.
In the works of George Mathew Adams, “In this life we get only those things for which we hunt, for which we strive and for which we are willing to sacrifice.”
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Agency developments and other news...
This week we communicated with our adoption agency’s Director and Social Worker. The good news is... 4 birthmothers that are signed on with our agency may “potentially match” with our criteria. Adoption profiles will be shared with these women in the coming weeks/months. This is encouraging for us as we wait for our 3rd match.
On another note, this summer has been an adventure. The months of June, July and August have been quiet and spent in self imposed seclusion. It’s been a time of reflection and self analysis about our current life and future goals. This period has been difficult but looking back one of great enlightenment.
This process has changed us and brought us to a very different outlook regarding our adoption goals and future family. We have been forced to look closely at ourselves and the people surrounding us. Our daily routine may have not wavered but our way of thinking has greatly shifted. We consider this change wonderful but the process has been unsettling.
I want to thank everyone that has allowed us to grieve on our own terms. Your quite sideline support has been essential for us to heal. Your kind words and thoughtfulness have gotten us through this experience. Thank you for giving us space.
As for our future…we are not giving up!!! We will continue to wait patiently and sometimes impatiently.
On another note, this summer has been an adventure. The months of June, July and August have been quiet and spent in self imposed seclusion. It’s been a time of reflection and self analysis about our current life and future goals. This period has been difficult but looking back one of great enlightenment.
This process has changed us and brought us to a very different outlook regarding our adoption goals and future family. We have been forced to look closely at ourselves and the people surrounding us. Our daily routine may have not wavered but our way of thinking has greatly shifted. We consider this change wonderful but the process has been unsettling.
I want to thank everyone that has allowed us to grieve on our own terms. Your quite sideline support has been essential for us to heal. Your kind words and thoughtfulness have gotten us through this experience. Thank you for giving us space.
As for our future…we are not giving up!!! We will continue to wait patiently and sometimes impatiently.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Chutes & Ladders (adoption version)
At present we feel like we are playing Chutes & Ladders. We advance 3 steps forward and find the path puts us 5 steps behind our originally location.
In spite of our last post, it seems our adoption profile was recently shared with a potential birthmother. We were not chosen. The word frustrated best describes our feeling, at this point. All we can do is look ahead to the next time our adoption agency shares our profile.
Below is our score card:
# of times Adoption Profile viewed: 5
# of times not chosen: 3
# of times matched w/birthmothers: 2
# of failed matches (birthmothers chose to parent): 2
# of months/days as a waiting adoptive family: 9 months & 10 days
In spite of our last post, it seems our adoption profile was recently shared with a potential birthmother. We were not chosen. The word frustrated best describes our feeling, at this point. All we can do is look ahead to the next time our adoption agency shares our profile.
Below is our score card:
# of times Adoption Profile viewed: 5
# of times not chosen: 3
# of times matched w/birthmothers: 2
# of failed matches (birthmothers chose to parent): 2
# of months/days as a waiting adoptive family: 9 months & 10 days
Friday, July 10, 2009
Now what??
Things seem to be at a stand still. Our adoption profile is not being shown. This is a complicated matter related to birthmother housing and our last two matches. It is our hope that by September our profile will be presented to potential birthmothers. We are waiting to see what transpires later in the fall.
We have no happy events to report as we wait in limbo. We are desperately trying to find some joy in all that has happened and what lies ahead for us. Some days are good but some days are a great struggle. Our friend Karla has reminded us, "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain!"
We have no happy events to report as we wait in limbo. We are desperately trying to find some joy in all that has happened and what lies ahead for us. Some days are good but some days are a great struggle. Our friend Karla has reminded us, "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain!"
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The last few weeks
Last week we experienced another loss with the disappearance of our second birthmother. We are not devastated by this latest event but feel exhausted from all the activities and emotions that have taken place over the last 6 weeks. During this short period we were matched with two birthmothers and experience the birth of a child. These weeks were full of doctor appointments, Sunday Masses, meals, shopping trips, study nights, late night telephone calls and stories of lives filled with turmoil and confusion.
Our last match did not work but we are grateful this birthmother decided early on that she would be unable to relinquish her child. The reality is we only knew birthmother #2 for 2 weeks. We are glad this relationship ended before we had time to bond with her and the baby.
Jose and I harbor no ill will and hope these young women find happiness and peace. Each of them made lasting impressions on us. We know the time we shared with them will be reflected on for years to come. We also know they too will remember us. As for the child we held and loved… we pray that God watches over her.
This part of our journey did not end the way we would have like. At times it has consisted of overwhelming emotion and emptiness. This portion of our trip has been extremely hard but it has made us stronger individuals and closer as a couple.
This is not over and with perseverance we will grow our family through adoption.
Our last match did not work but we are grateful this birthmother decided early on that she would be unable to relinquish her child. The reality is we only knew birthmother #2 for 2 weeks. We are glad this relationship ended before we had time to bond with her and the baby.
Jose and I harbor no ill will and hope these young women find happiness and peace. Each of them made lasting impressions on us. We know the time we shared with them will be reflected on for years to come. We also know they too will remember us. As for the child we held and loved… we pray that God watches over her.
This part of our journey did not end the way we would have like. At times it has consisted of overwhelming emotion and emptiness. This portion of our trip has been extremely hard but it has made us stronger individuals and closer as a couple.
This is not over and with perseverance we will grow our family through adoption.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Krafty Korner: Diaper Genie Cover
We are finishing up many household projects as our due date nears. We whipped up a Diaper Genie cover in one hour with fabric remnants. We saw an exact copy online but were not willing to pay 60 bucks! This is an easy project that anyone can accomplish with a little time and basic sewing skills.
Labels:
Krafty Korner,
Nursery Bedding,
Nursery Time
Sunday, May 31, 2009
A room full of imagination!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Saint Gerard
If you are Catholic you may know of Saint Gerard. He is the Patron Saint of motherhood and child birth. Many prayers of intersession are spoken to him on behalf of mothers and unborn children around the world. Saint Gerard also has special meaning for me as I (Brandon) was confirmed with the name Gerard. The Feast of Saint Gerard Majella is celebrated annually on October 16th.
Prayer for a Safe Delivery
O great Saint Gerard, beloved servant of Jesus Christ, perfect imitator of your meek and humble Savior, and devoted child of Mother of God, en kindle within my heart one spark of that heavenly fire of charity which glowed in your heart and made you an angel of love.O glorious Saint Gerard, because when falsely accused of crime, you did bear, like your Divine Master, without murmur or complaint, the calumnies of wicked men, you have been raised up by God as the patron and protector of expectant mothers.Preserve me from danger and from the excessive pains accompanying childbirth, and shield the child which I now carry, that it may see the light of day and receive the purifying and life-giving waters of baptism through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Saint Gerard's Story
Saint Gerard Majella, the "Patron Saint of Motherhood," was born in 1726 in a small town in the south of Italy called Muro. Gerard was devoted to his widowed mother and he also devoted his life to God and helping others. His selfless help to others in various circumstances endeared him to all sorts of people. He entered the Congregation of the Most Holy Redeemer in 1749 and became a lay brother. He was a model of obedience and possessed extraordinary wisdom. He spent his life dedicated to helping the needy and the poor, being poor himself and having an understanding of the sorrows of the needy. He often gave away his earnings and his own food to the poor and those that came to him never left empty-handed. Sometimes how the food or money came to be there was known only to God and to Gerard. He was also known to have mystical abilities such as powers of prophecy, healing, the reading of consciences, and so forth. He even predicted the day and hour of his own death. During his short life he helped many and performed many miracles. It seems that God had given him, in particular, the special power to help mothers in need. In life and since his death, he has helped so many women who have prayed to him during labor that he earned the nickname the "Saint of Happy Deliveries." Many mothers from all over the world have even named their child Gerard after him in gratitude, and have adopted him as their patron in the joys and fears of childbirth.
Saint Gerard Majella, the "Patron Saint of Motherhood," was born in 1726 in a small town in the south of Italy called Muro. Gerard was devoted to his widowed mother and he also devoted his life to God and helping others. His selfless help to others in various circumstances endeared him to all sorts of people. He entered the Congregation of the Most Holy Redeemer in 1749 and became a lay brother. He was a model of obedience and possessed extraordinary wisdom. He spent his life dedicated to helping the needy and the poor, being poor himself and having an understanding of the sorrows of the needy. He often gave away his earnings and his own food to the poor and those that came to him never left empty-handed. Sometimes how the food or money came to be there was known only to God and to Gerard. He was also known to have mystical abilities such as powers of prophecy, healing, the reading of consciences, and so forth. He even predicted the day and hour of his own death. During his short life he helped many and performed many miracles. It seems that God had given him, in particular, the special power to help mothers in need. In life and since his death, he has helped so many women who have prayed to him during labor that he earned the nickname the "Saint of Happy Deliveries." Many mothers from all over the world have even named their child Gerard after him in gratitude, and have adopted him as their patron in the joys and fears of childbirth.
Monday, May 25, 2009
We got a crib!
After months of works and many sewing projects our nursery is complete! Well... almost completed aside from the mural that will be added tomorrow. We purchased a crib and dressed it with our personalized bedding. We are ready for our little one.
Labels:
Krafty Korner,
Nursery Bedding,
Nursery Time
Friday, May 15, 2009
And Tango Makes Three
And Tango Makes Three is a wonderful book. It has gotten attention by bloggers and received reviews by various leading US newspapers. It's about two male penguins that care for an egg and create a family through adoption. In some circles controversy surrounds the published work. For us it is a wonderful story that has relevance for our non-traditional family.
Last year this book was spot lighted at my (Brandon's) birthday party. And Tango Makes Three became a table favor and parting gift for all our guests. It was also a great segue to announce our official plan to become adoptive parents.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Book of the week... Our Picks
Monday, April 20, 2009
Book of the week... Our Picks
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
The Visitor
This blog entry is a little strange and somewhat unbelievable. I would question the integrity of this story if I had not seen it with my own eyes.
Let me begin by giving you a little background for clarification. Houston, Texas is the 4th largest city in America . It's a sprawling metropolitan area covering urban and suburban tracks of land. We have lived in the urban center of the city for more than 20 years. Keep in mind... it’s not Manhattan but urban by every means.
Houston is officially referred to as The Bayou City because of the many bayous that run through it in route to The Gulf of Mexico. FYI… A bayou is a small slow moving stream or creek. The city's geographical location and various waterways provide a year round tropical habitat for abundant flora and fauna.
Last year we purchased a home specifically for the growing needs of our future family. Our home faces a courtyard which is shared by other home owners. The large landscaped area has various brick walkways, stately oaks, manicured shrubs and abundant flower beds. Our front door and our neighbor's front doors open onto this green space.
I recently went to retrieve our daily newspaper and had the crap scared out of me. Standing on our door step was a stork! Actually, we do not know if it was a stork, heron or egret. Regardless, this was the biggest damn bird I had ever seen outside of a zoo! I have never seen a bird like this in the sky or on the ground. The other strange thing is that this stork did not take much notice of me. The bird stood casually near our entryway for two or three minutes, gracefully walked away and then took flight.
Later that day my neighbor commented on my bird encounter. She said, “The bird had been arriving in the early morning hours over the last few months and only stands near our front door or window.” She also stated, “She had never before seen a stork in the ten years she has owned her home.” The other strange part is… we have not shared our adoption plans with any of our neighbors.
As I remember the story… storks bring babies! Jose and I are still a little baffled by this incident. We have one question for our viewers… does this strange occurrence fall under the category of coincidence or premonition? Give us your thoughts.
Let me begin by giving you a little background for clarification. Houston, Texas is the 4th largest city in America . It's a sprawling metropolitan area covering urban and suburban tracks of land. We have lived in the urban center of the city for more than 20 years. Keep in mind... it’s not Manhattan but urban by every means.
Houston is officially referred to as The Bayou City because of the many bayous that run through it in route to The Gulf of Mexico. FYI… A bayou is a small slow moving stream or creek. The city's geographical location and various waterways provide a year round tropical habitat for abundant flora and fauna.
Last year we purchased a home specifically for the growing needs of our future family. Our home faces a courtyard which is shared by other home owners. The large landscaped area has various brick walkways, stately oaks, manicured shrubs and abundant flower beds. Our front door and our neighbor's front doors open onto this green space.
I recently went to retrieve our daily newspaper and had the crap scared out of me. Standing on our door step was a stork! Actually, we do not know if it was a stork, heron or egret. Regardless, this was the biggest damn bird I had ever seen outside of a zoo! I have never seen a bird like this in the sky or on the ground. The other strange thing is that this stork did not take much notice of me. The bird stood casually near our entryway for two or three minutes, gracefully walked away and then took flight.
Later that day my neighbor commented on my bird encounter. She said, “The bird had been arriving in the early morning hours over the last few months and only stands near our front door or window.” She also stated, “She had never before seen a stork in the ten years she has owned her home.” The other strange part is… we have not shared our adoption plans with any of our neighbors.
As I remember the story… storks bring babies! Jose and I are still a little baffled by this incident. We have one question for our viewers… does this strange occurrence fall under the category of coincidence or premonition? Give us your thoughts.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Book of the Week... Our Picks
Friday, April 3, 2009
Nursery Time... Changing Table
One of our readers recently inquired about the changing table in our nursery. Here is the info...
We wanted a chest that would transition with the room as our child grows. We looked at a dozen matching cribs and dressers. We found nursery furniture to be pricey and inferior in quality. We chose this chest for it's height, storage capacity and solid wood craftsmanship. The entire piece is made of fruit wood and mahogany. Other great features include bow front design, dovetailed drawers, inlaid wood boarders and distressed brass hardware.
The chest has great potential to be used throughout our home at a later date. The Classic style would fit into any room and mix well with antiques or modern decor. It looks like a authentic English antique but comes without the hefty price tag. We purchased it at a local furniture retailer and spent $760.00 with retail tax. I have listed an online retailer's link below for interested viewers. The online retailer's price is a little more than we paid. You might want to shop your market area for a better deal.
As we always say... think outside of the box!
Universal Furniture Company
http //www.furniturefind.com/Universal-Furniture-518360-UNI2111.html
Item: Kentwood Bunching Bachelor's Chest
Weight: 161 lbs
Dimensions: 37" H x 40" W x 21" D
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Deep in the Heart of Texas...
This time of year a sea of blue appears across the vast Texas landscape. This is all due to our state flower The Blue Bonnet. If you're a Texan, you have been photographed in a sunny field surrounded by these tiny wispy flowers. If you cross our great state in spring, you will never forget the fields of blue surrounding our expansive highways.
This past weekend Jose and I left our comfortable life as city dwellers for a weekend excursion. Actually, we attended a wedding in the picturesque Texas Hill County. The destination was a few short hours from our home in Houston but worlds away from our day to day existence. The photos are from our little get away.
This weekend we also got a small dose of parenthood. We entertained the flower girl who is a child of a dear friend. Let me begin by saying, kids are very heavy! We had a wonderful time with her despite my arm needing amputation from carrying her. She is a delightful child and it was a wonderful glimpse into what our future holds.
Oh... and most importantly, congratulations to Jessica and John.
You make a beautiful couple!
This past weekend Jose and I left our comfortable life as city dwellers for a weekend excursion. Actually, we attended a wedding in the picturesque Texas Hill County. The destination was a few short hours from our home in Houston but worlds away from our day to day existence. The photos are from our little get away.
This weekend we also got a small dose of parenthood. We entertained the flower girl who is a child of a dear friend. Let me begin by saying, kids are very heavy! We had a wonderful time with her despite my arm needing amputation from carrying her. She is a delightful child and it was a wonderful glimpse into what our future holds.
Oh... and most importantly, congratulations to Jessica and John.
You make a beautiful couple!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Book of the week... Our Picks
Friday, March 27, 2009
Magic Number?
When we initially began to think through the adoption process we created a lengthy list of questions. The answers were to be gathered from various sources ranging from social workers, pediatricians, online resources and internal reflections. The answers were to be a combination teetered between facts and self-analysis. This part of the process took a lot of effort but has been very beneficial.
One of the reoccurring themes that kept surfacing through the process revolved around age. The questions were geared in different ways but ultimately the looming question at hand was, “Are we too old to adopt?” This was a complex question for us to answer.
Let me begin by saying… we’re both in our early 40’s. Let me loudly state... we are not old! We lead healthy active lives and can run circles around people half our age. We also know many couples much older than us having children. In vitro fertilization and adoption provide ageless possibilities for couples.
The question of age was not about our physical being or vanity but about our child’s future. Is it fair for a child to have older parents? Will we be alive to share all the important mile stones as our child enters their 20's and 30's? Will we be present and able to assist our child as they grow into a self sustaining adult?
Through research we began to realize many adoptive parents begin the adoption process in their 40’s. For these families children have been on hold in an effort to advance careers and further educational desires. For some couples adoption is a last resource when faced with infertility.
When all our statistics were calculated we realized that a magic number does not exist in regards to adoption. The fact is, people of all ages face illness and the possibility of death. The important factors we considered were… committing to loving a child unconditionally, providing for a child and giving 100% of ourselves to the experience.
Jose’ and I walk in faith and hope to be present as our future child matures. We realize that no promises have been made to us or any parent. Ultimately, we acknowledge this is our path in life regardless of our age.
One of the reoccurring themes that kept surfacing through the process revolved around age. The questions were geared in different ways but ultimately the looming question at hand was, “Are we too old to adopt?” This was a complex question for us to answer.
Let me begin by saying… we’re both in our early 40’s. Let me loudly state... we are not old! We lead healthy active lives and can run circles around people half our age. We also know many couples much older than us having children. In vitro fertilization and adoption provide ageless possibilities for couples.
The question of age was not about our physical being or vanity but about our child’s future. Is it fair for a child to have older parents? Will we be alive to share all the important mile stones as our child enters their 20's and 30's? Will we be present and able to assist our child as they grow into a self sustaining adult?
Through research we began to realize many adoptive parents begin the adoption process in their 40’s. For these families children have been on hold in an effort to advance careers and further educational desires. For some couples adoption is a last resource when faced with infertility.
When all our statistics were calculated we realized that a magic number does not exist in regards to adoption. The fact is, people of all ages face illness and the possibility of death. The important factors we considered were… committing to loving a child unconditionally, providing for a child and giving 100% of ourselves to the experience.
Jose’ and I walk in faith and hope to be present as our future child matures. We realize that no promises have been made to us or any parent. Ultimately, we acknowledge this is our path in life regardless of our age.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Book of the Week... Our Picks
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Nursery Lamps
Lamp Shade Face Lift
Project Materials:
Ribbon
Cloth Tape Measure
Lead Pencil
Fine Blade Craft Knife
Ice Pick
Project Tip:
The last two holes need to be 1/4 or 1/8 of an inch apart. This is where the bow will be tied.
Project Directions:
We pulled a couple of matching lamps out of storage for the nursery. The basic linen shades were very blah. They were great lamps in our other home but our nursery needed a little more color and pizazz.
We accomplished this quick makeover by marking equal spaces around the bottom circumference of the lamp. We then cut a tiny X over each of the markings with an fine blade craft knife. To finish, we stuck an ice pick thought the tiny Xs making holes. Finally, we ran medium weight cotton ribbon through the openings and finished with a simple bow. It gave the lamps an entirely different look.
Project Materials:
Ribbon
Cloth Tape Measure
Lead Pencil
Fine Blade Craft Knife
Ice Pick
Project Tip:
The last two holes need to be 1/4 or 1/8 of an inch apart. This is where the bow will be tied.
Project Directions:
We pulled a couple of matching lamps out of storage for the nursery. The basic linen shades were very blah. They were great lamps in our other home but our nursery needed a little more color and pizazz.
We accomplished this quick makeover by marking equal spaces around the bottom circumference of the lamp. We then cut a tiny X over each of the markings with an fine blade craft knife. To finish, we stuck an ice pick thought the tiny Xs making holes. Finally, we ran medium weight cotton ribbon through the openings and finished with a simple bow. It gave the lamps an entirely different look.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Krafty Korner: New Designs
We are either going to have a baby or are perfecting our skills at designing and manufacturing Haute baby essentials. This is another newly created bib/burp set for our future little one.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Diaper Bag Inserts
This clever organizer transforms any basic tote or messenger bag into a diaper bag. Multiple pockets organize bottles, diapers and baby wipes. Simply place it in your bag of choice. Great for Dads that don't want to carry a traditional diaper bag. The 6 pockets are constructed of fabric over a flexible frame.
Retailer: The Container Store
Actual Size: 26" W x 5" H
Cost:$19.99
Retailer's Website:
http://www.containerstore.com/browse/Product.jhtml?CATID=74227&PRODID=10019933
Thursday, March 19, 2009
The Feast of Saint Joseph
This is our personal alter assembled to honor Patron Saint Joseph. Tonight we attend Mass and pray for the intentions closest to our hearts.
Glorious Saint Joseph we raise our hearts and our hands to implore your powerful intercession. Please obtain for us from the kind heart of Jesus the help and graces necessary for our spiritual and temporal welfare. We ask particularly for the grace of happy deaths and the special favors we now implore. We pray and wait patiently to help a Birth Mother who is in need of assistance. We pray to raise a healthy and happy child that is in need of a home and loving family. Please hear our prayers and assist us in growing our family through adoption.
Glorious Saint Joseph we raise our hearts and our hands to implore your powerful intercession. Please obtain for us from the kind heart of Jesus the help and graces necessary for our spiritual and temporal welfare. We ask particularly for the grace of happy deaths and the special favors we now implore. We pray and wait patiently to help a Birth Mother who is in need of assistance. We pray to raise a healthy and happy child that is in need of a home and loving family. Please hear our prayers and assist us in growing our family through adoption.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Patron Saint of Fathers
Our Roman Catholic beliefs are very important to us. We rarely write about our religious life as we consider it private and sacred. We are breaking our rule of silence because tomorrow is a very special day. We also thought our readers, who are dads and adoptive parents, might enjoy this post as Joseph is the Patron Saint of Fathers.
Tomorrow, March 19th is the Solemnity of Saint Joseph. He is the husband of the Blessed Virgin Mary and Foster-Father to Jesus Christ. Feast tables are prepared, rituals are performed and prayers are spoken in his honor. Joseph is also Patron of The Universal Church, Carpenters and Social Justice. Many adoptive parents ask Saint Joseph to intercede, on their behalf, when praying for guidance and assistance related to matters of adoption.
Prayer to Patron Saint Joseph:
Glorious Saint Joseph, foster-father and protector of Jesus Christ! To you I raise my heart and my hands to implore your powerful intercession. Please obtain for me from the kind heart of Jesus the help and graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare. I ask particularly for the grace of a happy death and the special favor I now implore (REQUEST). Oh, guardian of the word incarnate, I feel animated with confidence that your prayers in my behalf will graciously be heard before the throne of God. (REQUEST)
O gracious Saint Joseph through the love you bear to Jesus Christ, and for the glory of His name hear my prayers and obtain my petition.
Traditional Feast Day Recipe :
Pasta di San Giuse (pasta with breadcrumbs symbolizing sawdust)
1 lb. Cooked Pasta (spaghetti or linguine)
Sauce: 2 TBSP olive oil, 5 cloves chopped garlic, pinch red pepper flakes,2 cups finely chopped fresh fennel, 2 cups crushed tomatoes, 2 TBSP tomato paste, 1 TBSP chopped fresh basil, 4 cans sardines (drained, boneless, skinless)
Heat oil in large pot and saute garlic and pepper flakes. Add fennel, crushed tomatoes, tomato paste and basil. Cover and let simmer 30 minutes until fennel is tender. Add sardines and simmer additional three minutes.
Topping: 1 TBSP olive oil, 1 cup fine bread crumbs.
Heat olive oil and add bread crumbs until golden brown.
Pour sauce over pasta, sprinkle with breadcrumbs and serve immediately.
Tomorrow, March 19th is the Solemnity of Saint Joseph. He is the husband of the Blessed Virgin Mary and Foster-Father to Jesus Christ. Feast tables are prepared, rituals are performed and prayers are spoken in his honor. Joseph is also Patron of The Universal Church, Carpenters and Social Justice. Many adoptive parents ask Saint Joseph to intercede, on their behalf, when praying for guidance and assistance related to matters of adoption.
Prayer to Patron Saint Joseph:
Glorious Saint Joseph, foster-father and protector of Jesus Christ! To you I raise my heart and my hands to implore your powerful intercession. Please obtain for me from the kind heart of Jesus the help and graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare. I ask particularly for the grace of a happy death and the special favor I now implore (REQUEST). Oh, guardian of the word incarnate, I feel animated with confidence that your prayers in my behalf will graciously be heard before the throne of God. (REQUEST)
O gracious Saint Joseph through the love you bear to Jesus Christ, and for the glory of His name hear my prayers and obtain my petition.
Traditional Feast Day Recipe :
Pasta di San Giuse (pasta with breadcrumbs symbolizing sawdust)
1 lb. Cooked Pasta (spaghetti or linguine)
Sauce: 2 TBSP olive oil, 5 cloves chopped garlic, pinch red pepper flakes,2 cups finely chopped fresh fennel, 2 cups crushed tomatoes, 2 TBSP tomato paste, 1 TBSP chopped fresh basil, 4 cans sardines (drained, boneless, skinless)
Heat oil in large pot and saute garlic and pepper flakes. Add fennel, crushed tomatoes, tomato paste and basil. Cover and let simmer 30 minutes until fennel is tender. Add sardines and simmer additional three minutes.
Topping: 1 TBSP olive oil, 1 cup fine bread crumbs.
Heat olive oil and add bread crumbs until golden brown.
Pour sauce over pasta, sprinkle with breadcrumbs and serve immediately.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Krafty Korner: Crib/Changing Pad
Monday, March 16, 2009
Book of the Week... Our Picks
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Krafty Korner: Diaper Stacker
This is another little project we completed for our little one. We purchased a Babies-R-Us diaper stacker and returned it after taking detailed measurements. The pattern was cut out of brown paper bags and creative engineering pulled it together. Actually, we were impressed with the results because the construction was more difficult than we originally anticipated. Total cost was $6.00 and the fabric matches our baby bedding. Contact us if you want detailed project instructions.
Labels:
Krafty Korner,
Nursery Bedding,
Nursery Time
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Making Room for Baby... Kid's Closets
We wanted to design a nursery closet that did not require a master carpenter or spending thousands of dollars. We did not need to reinvent the wheel but needed a few closet accessories. We doubled hanging space with little effort and a $15.00 budget. Keep in mind, this is temporary fix and our child will outgrow this design in a few years. These double hung rods will accommodate 85 infant or toddler outfits. FYI... we added children's wooden hangers from The Container Store for a custom look. http://www.containerstore.com/
The materials needed are below.
The materials needed are below.
Materials and Tools:
1 Wood Dowel/Closet Rod (no longer than three feet)
8 Eye Hooks (medium weight)
6 ft. of Interlocking Chain (medium weight)
Sandpaper
Handsaw
Needle Nose Pliers
Wire Cutter (heavy duty)
Carpenter's Level
Project Details:
On another note...
John at Gay Dads in Munchkinland has ask readers to participate in an online research project. He wants to see how far this little fortune cookie can travel. All you have to do is attach it to the bottom of your next blog post. It's that simple! In addition, check out his great blog at: http://gaydadsinmunchkinland.blogspot.com/.
John at Gay Dads in Munchkinland has ask readers to participate in an online research project. He wants to see how far this little fortune cookie can travel. All you have to do is attach it to the bottom of your next blog post. It's that simple! In addition, check out his great blog at: http://gaydadsinmunchkinland.blogspot.com/.
All John asks, if you participate, is to write a comment for tracking purposes. Here are his directions: Put the mouse over the fortune cookie and click save as and it will go into your pictures. When you post to your blog click on the add picture symbol to transpose the image. The fortune cookie should appear in the text screen. The image will initially appear as scrambled letters and numbers. When you click your mouse the picture should pop into view. If anyone has trouble, just let John know.
Friday, March 13, 2009
CPR Training
This week we attended CPR certification. This was an instructional session covering adult cardiopulmonary resuscitation and automated external defibrillators. Next week we cover infant and baby CPR. Our home study social worker suggested we take this educational venue. We just hope we don’t ever need to use it!
We will say that the time it takes to complete is a bit much. We will never get back these 4 hours. Even though, it is great information and just one more thing we can check off on our adoption checklist.
As we say… it’s for the Kid!
The class was really not a big deal but getting registered was the hard part. We called 5 different non-profit and for-profit agencies that offered CPR. Most of them had long wait lists and charged $40.00 to $100.00 per participant. Are these agencies out of their minds? FYI… the agency that was most disorganized was the American Red Cross. After much perseverance we finally found our CPR course provider of choice. The good news is it was completely free. Yes I said… FREE! We can thank the ladies of The Junior League of Houston for providing this free educational venue. If you are unfamiliar with The Junior League take a look at all they provide our city and communities across America.
The Junior League of Houston Inc.
http://www.juniorleaguehouston.org/ .
Founded in 1925, The Junior League of Houston, Inc. is an organization of women committed to promoting voluntarism, developing the potential of women, and improving communities through the effective action and leadership of trained volunteers. Its purpose is exclusively educational and charitable.
The Association of Junior Leagues International Inc.
http://www.ajli.org/?nd=home
The Association of Junior Leagues International Inc. encompasses 160,000 women in 292 Leagues in four countries who make a difference in their communities every day through their volunteer efforts.
We will say that the time it takes to complete is a bit much. We will never get back these 4 hours. Even though, it is great information and just one more thing we can check off on our adoption checklist.
As we say… it’s for the Kid!
The class was really not a big deal but getting registered was the hard part. We called 5 different non-profit and for-profit agencies that offered CPR. Most of them had long wait lists and charged $40.00 to $100.00 per participant. Are these agencies out of their minds? FYI… the agency that was most disorganized was the American Red Cross. After much perseverance we finally found our CPR course provider of choice. The good news is it was completely free. Yes I said… FREE! We can thank the ladies of The Junior League of Houston for providing this free educational venue. If you are unfamiliar with The Junior League take a look at all they provide our city and communities across America.
The Junior League of Houston Inc.
http://www.juniorleaguehouston.org/ .
Founded in 1925, The Junior League of Houston, Inc. is an organization of women committed to promoting voluntarism, developing the potential of women, and improving communities through the effective action and leadership of trained volunteers. Its purpose is exclusively educational and charitable.
The Association of Junior Leagues International Inc.
http://www.ajli.org/?nd=home
The Association of Junior Leagues International Inc. encompasses 160,000 women in 292 Leagues in four countries who make a difference in their communities every day through their volunteer efforts.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Dear Readers,
The purpose of Daddy Times Two is to keep family and friends updated about our adoption journey. We also plan to have a printed copy bound for our future son or daughter. We think it might be a good point of reference when faced with the question, "Where did I come from?" We hope these entries will give our child a better understanding of his or her beginning.
The above statements are true but more has evolved through our writing efforts. We have found the process to be very cathartic. The words have become a mechanism that enables us to release some of the anxiety that comes from being waiting adoptive parents. The act of writing about patience is an exercise that reminds us of this virtue.
The above statements are true but more has evolved through our writing efforts. We have found the process to be very cathartic. The words have become a mechanism that enables us to release some of the anxiety that comes from being waiting adoptive parents. The act of writing about patience is an exercise that reminds us of this virtue.
We are amazed by the amount of interest our blog has sparked. Over the past month Daddy Times Two has received over 500 Internet hits. Viewers have logged on from 22 states and 14 countries. This astounds us because we are not that interesting. We are touched by the encouraging comments and informational emails received from viewers. We would like to give special thanks to It's Daddies. Plural. http://itsdaddiesplural.blogspot.com/ and Adoption And My Two Daddies http://mytwodaddies.blogspot.com/. Thanks again to all of our readers and for the ongoing support!
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